I've Been Sent a Howler!

Not one of these, he's a little canine friend. Because I don't have enough to do, or enough people to keep alive and fed. In order to appreciate this story, I need to go back a few weeks.

Our dog Jill is getting old, fat and sassy. She has begun relieving herself on the basement carpet at night if we don't shut our bedroom door tightly. We've had her a long time, but incontinence is a bit of a deal breaker for me. (hear that boys? you've been warned!) A few Saturdays ago, Lewis was out of town, but it was okay because there was a church dinner. If I don't have to cook, all is right with the world. There was some sort of scout recognition and the big boys had to be early, so I sent them walking to the church. A few minutes later, I get a call from Dainon. "Mom, Jill just got hit by a car."
"What?! Are you joking? Is she dead?" There was a slightly hopeful sound to my voice.
"No, she's just limping on her back foot." Dang.
I went to pick her up, and found that she'd followed Dainon, and he hadn't sent her home. So she went and got herself run over, but not enough to finish the job.
Don't hate me, I'm not an animal person. I'm a people person. I like animals just fine, but they aren't on the same tier to me as humans.
Her back paw was injured. I looked at her, and saw dollar signs. I knew that I was going to miss that lovely dinner that I didn't have to cook. I was going to miss my boys' recognition, and everyone was going to think I was one of those flaky moms that just drop their kids off at stuff.
I called Lewis.
"Honey, Jill's been hit by a car. Where's your gun?"
"What?! How is she? How bad is she hurt?"
"She probably has a broken paw. Can I put her down? Please?"
"No."
Double Dang.
I didn't know if I actually could pull the trigger. Then I thought about her poop on my freshly shampooed carpet, and I thought I could. Lewis' dad told me about when his wife's cat came home badly injured with intestines hanging out. He knew the vet bills would be big, so he got out his 22 and took matters into his own hands. He washed, dried and fluffed the kitty back up. Then he curled it up under a bush like it was sleeping.
"Oh, look honey, I've found your cat."
"Ooo," she cooed "It looks like she went in her sleep."
He smiled.
I called him, and asked him to come up for a visit.
A week after this happened, Lewis came home with this little creature.

His friend from work had been begging us to take him. I'd been saying no, no, never. But they desperately needed a babysitter for the weekend. So, there he was, looking like some unholy combination of rat, monkey and dog. I approached him and he stood on his hind legs. I lifted him up from under his arms like a baby, and something magical happened: He put his arms around my neck and hugged me tightly. I'm not kidding. His breed has double jointed paws and can use them a lot like arms. He imprinted on me like some kind of werewolf in a vampire novel. I am now his whole world. Know what he's doing in this photo? Waiting and howling for me to come home. At first it was a little irritating not being able to take so much as a step without bumping into him, but he's relaxed a bit. He's quite naughty and steals food. When he's home alone, he has to be in his crate or he marks things (oh, the incontinence of it all!) But we like him. He makes us laugh. Violin practice is one of our favorite times now, see why?

*Oh, and Jill is still alive, and her paw is healing nicely.

I'm Flying!

It finally happened. I sent my chickadees out the door today for school! My trashed house is a long way towards order and peace. Now I just need to spend a quality afternoon with my TV and laundry. I feel like this huge weight has been lifted! Liam starts preschool on Wed, and then for three mornings a week, I'll be flying totally solo. I can't really take that in yet.
It was hilarious, the other day we were seated around the table, heads bowed in prayer before dinner. Lewis was giving thanks for all our blessings, and then deviated a bit. "We thank thee for school that is about to start, for all the hours and hours that Missy will have when her house will stay clean- for all the free time she will have to work on fun projects and enjoy peace and quiet...." He went on and on while I slumped with my head on my arms shaking with silent laughter. I believe I uttered a heartier than usual AMEN!

I Leveled Up!

This is what my boys call it if you've gained a new skill, learned to do something hard, or otherwise acquired experience points.

I'll let you in on a little secret. I used to be the wimpiest mom in the world. I wouldn't even take my boys grocery shopping by myself. For good reason. Little by little, I've gained confidence. Two years ago, I took my oldest three boys on an adventure to attend General Conference- that was huge for me. This week I did something that totally tops that: I took all 5 boys on a beach vacation adventure. All by myself. Monday, I got a wild hair. I thought to myself, "This has been a really lame summer for the boys. They should be able to have some fun." So I did some internet research, reserved a hotel room (camping is out of the question!) loaded up all the kids, and away we went! It was a solid 6 hour drive, and I only got lost once. At that point, I pulled into a Geico office and begged for directions. It worked, and we made it the rest of the way just fine.

I learned a few things. First, I have the coolest, funniest kids in the world. Sorry, but I took all the most interesting boys.

Second, I will never again try to fit 6 people on two queen beds. Ever. I thought I was saving money. No, I just purchased a terrible nights' sleep.

Third, I can do this. I can take the kids places overnight and still have so, so, so, so much fun.

Take a look!

We just happened to be at the best tide pools in northern Oregon at low tide. The boys climbed all over rocks, hunted crabs, played with starfish for hours.

Insert your own sound effects here: shrieks, screams, frantic calls for the brothers to come see the biggest crab of all time.

This was his first experience with the ocean since he was four.

This guy was fascinated by the sea. He had to explore every wave, every nook and cranny of every rock.

This guy had to test his nerve, out there in the freezing waves. How far out there could he go? I think he went under a couple of times. The big boys were wild men in the waves.

What's a boy outing without fire?

This is proof that I was actually there.

The scenery was amazing. We were at Ecola State Park. We're going back. We have to.

I begged, pleaded and commanded them to all get together for a group shot. This was all I got.

Logan buried himself in the sand, and Dainon came up and asked, "Does it hurt if I punch you right there?" As I recall, the answer was yes.

Doesn't the scenery just make you swoon?

Liam had a ball sticking his fingers into the little sea creatures. They're sticky and close around your finger. Are they anemone? Maybe.

The first day at the beach, I was pretty nervous, and lectured the boys on never turning their backs on the waves, and what to do if they got caught in a rip tide. I was sure someone would get nabbed by some freak wave and I wouldn't be paying attention and I wouldn't realize it until that night at dinner. If you know me, you know that could happen.

The next day, I just relaxed and enjoyed being with them. Like I said before, they were crawling all over some really sharp boulders. Even Liam, who the day before was nervous to get his toes wet, was leaping around like a mountain goat. I was with them the whole time, though. A couple who looked like they were in their 50s made their way over the rocks to me, and asked me if all those boys were mine. I smiled and told them yes, they were. They congratulated me on letting them play and really be boys. They told me they had figured they were brothers because of the way they interacted. That made me feel really good. There are so many things about mothering that I'm pretty terrible at. Letting my boys have adventures is something I really get. Having that noticed made me feel all bubbly inside.

Home.

I've been home for a couple of weeks. For a while there, the jet lag worked in my favor. I blinked awake at 5am every day, as chipper as can be. I was tired in the evening, but it didn't seem to slow me down much. I'm over it now, perfectly capable of sleeping in until 9 if given the chance.
My oldest son went to his first stake dance. (!!!!!!) I was mastered by the urge to spy on him, so I went to pick him up 15 mins before the dance was over. What a flashback! They were playing the exact same Bryan Adams song that Lewis and I danced to at stake dances. Nothing against Bryan Adams ballads, but dang. They need some new music. Dainon was teased mercilessly about his mother skulking about the dance,but it just rolled right off him. "She was just there to make sure my shirt stayed on." Classic, huh?
My second son got to go to Uncle Gib's house and work bees with him. Yes, my husband's only brother is a bee farmer. There's a fancy word for it, but it escapes me now. Logan got to do some serious work for more money than he's had in his whole life. On the way home, we introduced the concept of saving for his mission. (yes, if I were more responsible, that would have happened a decade ago) There might have been a tear or two over that.
I've also been looking at my Ireland pics, and I thought I'd share some more. Some of the silly ones.

Here's one of me driving in the wrong side of the car, on the wrong side of the road with a sitck shift in the wrong hand. It was very late at night, and we were a little tipsy. I don't need alcohol to get tipsy. I just need to be with girls, late at night, listening to fun music, telling funny stories and feeling wild and crazy. We went out in search of an authentic Irish pub. Strictly for the atmosphere, mind you. They were all closed, so Kimberly pulled over and let me drive. I got the kph/mph mixed up and was going way too fast, but I thought I was going too slow.

Some people have no sense of adventure! We hit some bumps, avoided a collision, and I decided to pass the torch back to Kimberly. Just in time. We saw a bunny. We stopped to take pictures, and voila.
The cops. The Garda, as they're called in Ireland. They just stopped to make sure we were okay, but I'm sure glad I wasn't driving!

This one cracks me up. I'd been posing for a perfectly lovely portrait when I got caught in some one's wicked tailwind. A digestive disturbance, if you will. Our road trip was hilarious, because at some point we all had health ailments that hindered our progress. All three of us were pretty pathetic. Most of you know that I have a delightful condition that can make life interesting if I get a little dehydrated. In order to abate my suffering, I need to get fully hydrated, as quickly as possible. Alas, what goes in, most come out, every 5 minutes for over an hour. What fun! On a long road trip, that can add an extra spice to liven things up. Lets just say that I have christened the land of my ancestors.

I love this pic of my sister, she's so cute.

Good times, I tell you.

Pictures

I was so sad as I was taking these pictures, because the camera just doesn't do Ireland justice. So when you look at these, keep it mind that is was WAY more spectacular in person. The beauty literally hurt my heart. Click on any of them to see up close.

It's Over. Almost.

I can't believe it, I am now on home soil. I'm not actually home yet, though. I flew into Spokane late last night, and stayed to sleep at the Earl's. It was so good to see my two sleeping babies! I smooched their cheeks and whispered how much I love them. Yesterday was a day that lasted about 60 hours. We began Tuesday with an all-out sight seeing blitz. We walked through the oldest castle in Ireland, it was built in 1180-something. It had been in the family for 30 generations, then sold to the Irish government in the 70s. I was drooling over the library there. Then we drove to the coast (a 15 min drive) and had lovely fresh fish and chips. Yum, with vinegar and salt! We hiked along a scary cliff-side path that left me feeling woozy, then we fed seals on the wharf. They're huge! It began to rain, but we hit the beach anyway. We frolicked in the surf in the pouring rain and got soaked. It was a blast! I have pictures of all this, and I'll share them when i get home. We drove home in various states of undress and got ready to hit the pub. We drove through downtown Dublin, which has been around since 100BC, and marvelled at the architecture. Then we shopped for souvenirs, so fun! The pub we stopped for dinner at was on Temple Bar, and there was a fantastic dinner show. A trio played traditional Irish songs and sang. Some of them were so bawdy that they asked Kimberly to cover her daughter's ears from the stage. I was so frustrated because I couldn't understand all the words. I appreciate a good bawdy drinking song, you know. Then the Irish dancers came on. They had performed all over the world and blew us away. We got home after midnight and started packing. We had to be a the airport at 3:30, so we figured, why sleep? We didn't, so after a 3 hour flight to Amsterdam, some crazy confusion there, (we had a connecting flight not listed in our itinerary) an 81/2 hour flight to Philly, another delay, then a 5 1/2 hour flight to Seattle, then a panicked run for my sis to catch a flight to Salt Lake that should have left before we arrived, I had to take 2 trains, 4 flights of escalators to get to my flight. On my last flight to Spokane, a guy who sat behind me literally never shut his mouth. Ever. But I made it without killing him, or even being rude. I pulled into the in laws house at just before 11 pm. I realized I hadn't eaten since Amsterdam. Then I couldn't sleep. I eventually did, and thus ended the longest day of all time. Now I just have a 2 1/2 hour drive home. I hope I don't fall asleep. If I do, all my gifts for everyone are in the smaller black bag. Got it?

Discoveries

This intrepid traveler has discovered many interesting facts about Ireland. The first, is that you take your life in your hands when you go jogging/walking on narrow winding roads at dusk. Especially if there is a steep bank on either side of the road filled with nettles. It's all trails for me from now on. It was a breath-taking walk though.
Another is that a majority of the people here are, let's just say, on the petite side. I could seriously be a pro wrestler here. I could call myself Amazonia. There could really be a future for me here. Kim assures me that all the men that I see that look to be lighter than 115 lbs are not indeed Irish. All the Irishmen at that time of day would be in the pub. This leads me to my next discovery.
There are tons of Polish people here. The Polish people are slightly resented because they flood the workforce here and work really hard, then send the money back home. Sounds familiar, huh? It was so much fun to peruse the aisles of the grocery store, eavesdropping on all the conversations in Polish. I only remember a few phrases, so unless they were saying they had to pee, I wouldn't be able to understand them. I did make me homesick for Poland, though.
Look at the teensy carton of milk! Not a gallon in sight.
One sister for sale! Did we look like dorks to all the Polish shoppers? Yep.
My mom was a Kerr, so I thought these potatoes were cool.
Look at how bright and clean the carrots are! The produce was so fun to look at, each little container was from a different place in the EU. Cherries were from Greece, blueberries from Poland, parsnips from Spain.... Look, I'm a professional grocery shopper back home. Could I resist the lure of the local store? Indeed not!
Want to know something cool? Everything is in English AND Gaelic. Britain was ruthless at trying to homogenize Ireland. Now Gaelic is required for every school child. Way to stick it to the Man, Ireland!
We're heading into the countryside for a road trip to Limerick today, so get ready for lots of pictures of pastoral fields, cottages and sheep. I can't wait!!!