Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Urgent Care Chronicles

I've had a busy summer. Last week as I approached the counter at urgent care, I got a sympathetic smile of recognition from the gal signing us in. They know me by sight now. This is our family's fourth visit in as many weeks.
I hate going to urgent care. For the most part, I'm there because one of my boys has done something inconsistent with his intelligence. I have two types of boys. Half got the mental toughness gene, half have to work at it. It's always the ones who have to work at it that get hurt. Why is that?
One boy was doing materials experiments in his room. It seemed like a good idea to use a 10 pound weight to smash a metal incense bowl left by our exchange student. Little metal discs had neat designs epoxied to them, and when they were smashed, they looked cool. Who wouldn't do that? Well, he squished his finger too. Little finger guts were coming out. He was sure he was going to die. He very loudly wished he would die. He howled that he wished he'd never been born. He was positive there was some metal still inside the finger guts. There was no metal there. He needed no stitches, it was too messy to close up. They bandaged it and it was good as new in a few days.
If you ask my other boy how he ended up with a sliver of glass in the pad of his foot, he'll give you a long, complicated story that begins with soccer in the back yard and ends with him standing on one leg with his foot in the kitchen sink. The offending glass shard left over from a dropped jam jar became lodged in his foot as he balanced on it with the other foot in the sink. Makes perfect sense, right? I tried to dig out the glass, but no dice. We've learned with this boy that a sliver of glass can become a big deal.
A few years ago, a tiny sliver of glass in his big toe developed a wicked black spot that just kept growing. I was hoping it would just work it's way out, but as the red streaks were working their way up his leg, we opted for the ER. After some gross toe squirting and IV antibiotics, he sported a hole the size of a marble in his toe. No school for over a week until he could wear a shoe.
When this current shard of glass started to get a little sore and red, I decided to nip it in the bud. There was some trauma over the shots, but once the foot was numb and digging commenced, he was fine. The digging went on and on. After a while, the Doc gave up. He said he couldn't find it. He told me it would have to just work it's way out. By this time, I'm having liquefied toe tissue flashbacks. Just as the Dr. was ready to bandage him up, my boy asks, "What's that shiny thing right there on my foot?" Sure enough, an inch away from the dig, was the shard of glass. It had been flushed out by the bleeding and wiping. I heaved a huge sigh of relief.
Any bets on how long it'll be before I'm hauling another tearful and luckless boy back there?


Sleepless In St. George said...

I feel blessed that we have only had one cast and one time getting stitches (both were unfortunate accidents caused by dad, but the urgent care didn't need to know that info. as Neil put it, "I wanted them to let me bring the kid home" and he felt terrible for both accidents! Let's hope with school starting the trips to urgent care will end.

Jana said...

I do not envy you. I am very happy in my blissful life of being married to a doc who likes to dig stuff out of my little people and when he doesn't succeed HE takes them to the urgent care. So I'm very sorry for you.

SkinnyJeanGirl said...

Don't you love having boys? My Daredevil is the one who is constantly being taken to ER. At age 2 it was a cast, age 3 it was staples in his head. I don't want to think what it will be next. As far as stickers, slivers, and glass go, they let mom, the nurse in training, pick them out.

Home of the Muddy Kids said...

Gross. It's moments like this that I am grateful my children are, um, cautious.

Jodi said...

Oh boys! I used to be so proud that we hadn't had a broken bone in umpteen years, but then my middle son broke his arm snowboarding. Since then it seems it's been nonstop! It is funny to see how they all handle it so differently. I am the baby here and my hubby gets mad because I am not setting a good example to them! Too bad! I HATE pain!!! ANd I'm NOT going to fake that I dont'!

fivekidsandsomechocolate said...

I so enjoy the way you describe your little men. Knowing them makes it even more entertaining...and a little more ouchy.

Anonymous said...

Mine seems to be very careful so far, he wrecks things around him but he is very particular at protecting his head, he is only one year old though.

But now that he has learned how to walk, he loves giving grandma heart attacks, he runs towards the table with a smirk on his face and then he ducks at the last second avoiding the impact :)

But since he is a combination of me and John, I have an idea of what to expect in the next years, and considering we are both still in one piece there is hope :)(strangely neither one of us managed to break any bones as a child).

I always love reading the stories you blog about your boys, they are so cute.
It's fun whan they do something fun and original, but it's never fun when they get hurt.


My Three Sons said...

Is this where the saying "Boys will be boys" comes from? I think so! It amazes me the kind of mischief they get themselves into and the kind of injuries they get along the way!

Anonymous said...

I feel your pain. Last time we went to the ER, the doctor joked that we should have our own parking space and a coffee mug in the breakroom.

Our record is stitches twice in two weeks for the same boy. Both times were brother induced injuries. One was an oar smack to the back of the head and the funny thing is, we don't even have a boat.

Jenn said...

I'm going to wager two weeks until the next E.R. visit.

Doran & Jody said...

Oh man oh man.....maybe that's why I never could have any boys. I remember my brother always sportin' a cut or bruise when he was growing up. His son is just like him.
Good luck!!!
Does the Dr. allow you to call ahead now?