Enough Already!

I like the quiet life. My idea of adventure is packing up dinner and eating it in the park. Speed, danger, adrenaline.....it's just not my thing. So I'm wondering, what's with all the mortal peril lately?
All I wanted to do was work out at the gym. I just got a bunch of hours worth of gym babysitting for free (I've always felt too cheap to pay for the gym AND babysitting)and I wanted to try it out. So Friday after school, I hauled my considerable horde to the health club with the motto "A Family Place to Be!". Everyone 6 and older could swim, and I'd been prepping my little leprechaun for the toy room. I had my music, my water, I was good to go! Except...isn't there always an 'except'? Except, this turned out to be the only afternoon of the week when the toy room was closed. So I was stuck. No workout. Everyone but Blade was swimming, so we bounced basketballs, practiced ninja moves on punching bags and sat. Finally, the hour was up and I called the boys out of the pool to change. The rest of us went to the lobby to sit some more. Everything was quiet and low key, the little guy was mellow and peaceful. I picked up a magazine and tried to find an article to read that wasn't about Britney Spears or Ellen's wedding. All of a sudden, a woman a few feet from me shouted "OH NO!" and started running past me. As soon as the words left her mouth, there was a terrible crash, and the sound of shattering glass. I jumped and ran too, and just around the corner in a little alcove lay my little guy, surrounded by shards and daggers of broken glass.
At this club, there's a little nook that's not visible unless you're directly in front of it. In the nook, there's a bar height glass table, and tall stools around it. My little guy loves to go over there and sit. He was doing just that, when something happened and he fell, pulling the stool and the table over on top of him. The thick glass top was in pieces. His hands were glittering with glass slivers. Miraculously, all he got was a tiny cut on his scalp, and a nick on one hand. He didn't even need a bandaid. When I saw he was okay, I was only aware of being deeply embarrassed that my kid had made such a disaster. We beat a hasty retreat. That night though, as I was laying in bed, it hit me how lucky he was. What really happened was the best case scenario. There were infinite ways he could have been maimed or killed. I stayed up a long time, picturing those in my head.
All I know is, I'm putting in a request for a few boring, ordinary weeks! ASAP!